Thursday, January 03, 2008

I am telemarketers' worst nightmare

Just half an hour ago, I had a phone call from one of those irritating telemarketers. This is how it went.

Telemarketer (with a strong Indian accent): Hello. Can I speak to Mr I.Z please?

Me : Who is this speaking?

Telemarketer: Are your Mr I.Z?

Me (suspecting he is a telemarketer): Who are you?

Telemarketer: I'm looking for Mr I.Z. Are you Mr I.Z?

Me: I'm I.Z Reloaded (nearly wanna laugh). What is this about?

Telemarketer: So you Mr I.Z? Mr I.Z, I want to ask you if you are looking to sell or buy properties.

Me (fark! property telemarketer!): What? Sell or buy properties? How you know?!

Telemarketer: Sir, I have you on my database of people looking to buy or sell properties.

Me: What is a database?

Telemarketer: Sorry sir?

Me: What do you mean by database?

Telemarketer: Database sir, we have a list of people's names and phone numbers.

Me: Wow. How much did you buy that database for?

Telemarketer: (went silent for a few seconds) Mr I.Z, are you looking to buy or sell a property?

Me: Hmmm. Not currently but are you looking to buy or sell one yourself? I can recommend you to a good property agent. (ok. now I'm starting to crack up)

Telemarketer: No no sir. I mean I'm asking you if you want to buy or sell your property.

Me: Nope.

Telemarketer: Oh. Are you interested in buying property in India, sir?

Me: Huh? India?! Why India?

Telemarketer: I'm from an international property company sir.

Me: Got Batam?

Telemarketer: Batam? No sir. We only have India.

Me: But I thought you said you are from an international property company. How can you not sell property in Batam?

Telemarketer (I can sense he is frustrated now): Mr I.Z, I'm sorry we do not have any Batam now.

Me: Have you been to Batam? Have you seen what a good place it is to do property there? Let me talk to your boss. He must sell Batam.

Telemarketer: (went silent again for a few seconds) Mr I.Z, I'm really sorry. So you do not want to buy India property?

Me: I want Batam. You call me again when you have Batam ok.

Telemarker: Ok dokie. Thank you Mr I.Z. Good bye.

Me: Bye.

I could have gone for another half an hour with him but too bad, lunch is waiting.

(Photo above by Flickr user babaghan)


Shy said...

Hahaha! You are so cruel.

Bengster said...

Batam property good meh?

dann said...

hahaha!!! good one!!!

Myra Leong said...

Me: I'm I.Z Reloaded (nearly wanna laugh).


Thank god he did not call you Mr Reloaded after that.

Anonymous said...

best if u got record d conversation

Giselle Loh said...

I wonder what if the telemarketer was a lady with a nice sexy voice. Ahem.

Ah Tiong said...

jin kiang

plaktoz said...

*clap clap* you owned the telemarketers. But problem is what if the company got properties in Batam?

Phantasma said...

Gawd! You're so funny!

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