Reader Johnny Q sent me this list of top ten signs why I'm not Superman. Great, Johnny. Next time when you are in trouble, don't hope that I will fly to come and save you mate.
Top Ten Signs I'm not Superman
1. The only way you got the pickle jar open was by smashing it with a hammer.
2. Exposure to Kryptonite only gives you a ringing in the ears.
3. Evil supervillains don't know your girlfriend or where she lives.
4. When your therapist says "Lex," you say "-us"
5. The armor piercing bullets rip through your flesh like a hot knife through butter.
6. Instead of "It's a bird, it's a plane..." people say "What the fuck is that ugly thing?"
7. Your home planet is still habitable, but your father sent you here anyway.
8. You look pretty dorky in a cape.
9. Your X-Ray vision only enables you to see through glass.
10. Your application to the Justice League was rejected.
(Thanks Johnny Q)